My Plutonic years are coming! A recent reminder to the July 7th lunar eclipse also reminded me of the place where Pluto is going to be in my natal chart in the coming years. I do remember that when Pluto first crossed the border to Capricorn I felt like a giant load was removed from my shoulders. Something really heavy which I had been carrying around for years and years was suddenly lifted, never to return again.

Right now Pluto has been squaring my Moon. I’m on the virge of moving out of the parental home, which seems to match with the descriptions usually given to this transit. Power conflicts I didn’t really notice yet, but that’s perhaps because of my occupation. It’s the task of the day as far as I’m concerned and can therefor no longer count for something with such impact. Other big changes, I don’t know. I do notice, certainly now that the economy is in recession, that I have trouble coping with restrictions placed upon me from the outside world. I feel like I have less than the desired control on my own life than I want. As a dutiful Virgo/Cap Ascendant, I even have moments where I almost cannot resist of doing something stupid or crazy. Everyone knows, Virgo/Cap people don’t really do stupid and crazy stuff. It’s in their taboo book, right next to: “just act normal and you’re crazy enough”.

Perhaps these Pluto transits will eventually enable me to regain control in a manner that I feel is satisfactory. What I truly do hope, is that the power of my 8th house will be unleashed. Pluto is the dispositor of the 8th house, and therefor every transit it makes activates the roaring power in that 8th house. I do believe that through the years trying to carry that 8th house, I have built up what is necessary to not simply succumb to a Pluto transit, even though I might feel fearful of big decisions. In a sense, I am looking forward to the coming years as a means to “having it my way”.  However, merely ‘getting my own place‘ is not going to cut it for me. I want some kind of possibility which enables me to take control and make a choice for myself and go for it with 500%. I’m still in the stage that I am searching for a ‘choice’ that will spark this kind of motivation. Whether it be professional or personal, it doesn’t even matter.

As a 10 degrees Capricorn Ascendant, it’s still going to take a while before Pluto will conjunct this point, namely 2013. Influence will probably start in 2010. Right now I think it’s just a continuation of the Pluto square Moon transit. If Pluto square Moon is making me desire to have control fruitlessly over my direction, perhaps it is Pluto conjunct Ascendant that will make me succesfully exert the influence. Due to my history, I am absolutely committed to have nobody overshadow me, ever. It’s like: I did not fight the entire world and then some to get in a situation where there’s no way out. I’m just oozing with confidence and I can probably take on every setback if I just had that thing, that someone, that career, that whatever it is (…)

Under the control of Pluto, you can almost taste it, feel it coming. “Something big is about to happen”. Something of enormous proportion, life changing. Right now I live with the enormous frustration of “waiting for the day the moment comes”.